So Alone
I’ve been living by myself for a few days now and the most dramatic change seems to be, I don’t have to ask permission to do things anymore.
No, I don’t mean literally ask permission, but before, if I wanted to, say, move a chair to a new place, I had to ask someone else for their opinion about whether or not they thought it would look good in the new place.
Now, I just move the damn chair.
I’ll give you another example. Last night I had a sushi craving, and before I would have had to ask other people if they wanted to tag along, and if they didn’t, I would have perhaps felt weird about going myself. I mean, if I went and had sushi without them, what would they do for dinner?
These are the stupid things I worry about.
But last night, I just got in the car and went down to Champa by myself without having to worry about what others were going to do for dinner.
And of course this is where I hit the rub.
Going to a restaurant by yourself sucks.
You look around at people at the other tables, dining in couples or groups of friends, and you realize. You’re alone. So very alone.
March 26th, 2008 at 5:15 pm
There are times, such as when I’m traveling by myself without the husband, that dinner alone in a restaurant is inevitable. I take a book. It makes a big difference.
March 26th, 2008 at 10:37 pm
if you take a book with you, you might not feel quite so odd, especially if it’s a really good book.
March 27th, 2008 at 12:37 am
yeps, i wont eat out by myself. or go to movies by myself. bf says im nuts. i just say im insecure.
March 29th, 2008 at 4:56 am
A book helps. If I eat alone without a book, then I find that I eat way to fast. I’ve only done the eat alone thing when I’m traveling. It’s not as much fun as having a dinner date!
April 1st, 2008 at 8:51 pm
you know. i have never actually lived alone… weird.